We Will Do Better

It's so easy to get caught up in the moment, the circumstance and the frustration of delays and disappointment. Fuck that. We have to get up, keep moving and do a little more.

Fighting chronic chest pressure the past year, while working diligently on my mental health and a new startup has been…taxing. Thankfully, most of the time, in the best ways possible.

This season has clarified who my friends and "chosen" family are. The realization and acceptance of who really is in my corner, who actually shows up and gives a damn — virtually or in-person — is freeing.

Suddenly, what others think matters less and less. It's been a moment of contemplation, testing and proving.

Progress is success.

I used to be so wrapped up in exceeding the expectations of others. This led to a cycle of anxiety, depression and worry. Until…the alarm clock went off.

It felt like a volleyball in my chest. It still does most days.

Shocked, confused and determined to win.

I learned that the medical trauma I experienced at birth implanted a ticking time bomb. Something inside of me that now traps some combination of air and fluid in my chest.

There must be a purpose to things. I happened to move to Aurora, Colorado in the months before my invisible time bomb made its first LOUD tick.

What's in Denver? National Jewish Hospital: one of the leading respiratory research hospitals in the country. Just 30 minutes away from my home.

Respiratory therapists, pulmonologists, palliative care, cardiologist and a thoracic surgeon. My amazing team. Super Jews — regardless of their religion (didn't ask, don't much care).

I have access to the best care available. My primary care NP has an office 5 minutes down the road.

Could I have been luckier? Right place at the most important time. Turns out…

…I also serendipitously ran into some of my best friends from my high school years in Virginia Beach. They just so happened to live out here, too!

So…I couldn't ask for more.